Janice Toy: living her truth

In 1974, a diva-in-waiting was born to a single mother on Milwaukee's near North Side.

Janice lived in an upper flat in a duplex owned by her mother’s parents.  Her mother came from a very religious family background, so she was sheltered and protected as an only child. This hardworking mother and child led a quiet life. 

But, like many kids from the LGBTQ spectrum, Janice knew she was different early on. 

Instead of playing ball or climbing trees with the neighborhood kids, she wanted to jump rope, make mud pies, or play house where they could reign as the mama like the “girls” did. Janice had always looked up to her mother, whose resolve and commitment to living life to the fullest would become a pattern for the shape her later years would take.

Raised with a robust church-going foundation, attending services was mandatory and celebratory. Janice looked forward to seeing what the ladies dressing for service had on and secretly wished she could wear the fancy hats and dresses, too. The glitz of some of the male congregants was accepted as long as it was a part of the ritual of praise. 

Later, after the arrival of a sibling when she was nine years old, Janice had to share her mother’s love with her brother and develop her fortitude. 

She looked forward to Halloween each year, where she could “dress up” with the full acceptance of the community.

After high school graduation, she enrolled in elementary education at Lane College in Jackson, Tennessee. Having relatives living there made this transition a safe move, allowing her the first freedom to explore her identity further.

She came into her own in 1992 while at Lane. She had moved out of state, she said, “So I could learn who I was.” It was like being freed from a cage of expectations that her family and friends in Milwaukee had created. She started to meet others like herself and learned there was a big world with people who shared her feelings.

Her first gay bar experience was at the Apartment Club in Memphis, about an hour’s drive from Lane College. It was a Black gay bar that opened a whole new meaning of life to her. She saw women like herself; people living their truth. She was abundantly happy and having a good time.

In due time, friends and acquaintances in her new milieu encouraged her to enter her first drag pageant, Miss Gay Memphis At Large, and she won. Her reputation as a diva was cemented, and there was no turning back. 

Or was there?

Back to Milwaukee

Just when Janice thought she was on the path to her dreams, an unexpected accident brought her back to Milwaukee.

Her mother, who had broken her leg, needed Janice's help. When her mother discovered her trunk filled with wigs, jewelry, and women’s attire, she knew she had to have “the talk” with her mom. At first, she thought she’d have to continue hiding. Still, after chatting with her wise and loving grandmother, Janice decided to go there with her mother. She came out to her.

Through their mutual tears of recognition, Janice received her mother’s unwavering support and the comforting knowledge that “you’ll always be my child.”

This diva could not rest, not while there was her hometown to conquer. Once again, she got into her gig and performed in shows at Milwaukee’s gay Black bars, such as ReneZ, Tina’s, Katie and Zip’s, and many more. 

Janice was living out her fantasy of glamour and glitz. She went on to win numerous drag titles such as Miss Black Wisconsin 1998, Miss Gay Minneapolis 1998, Miss Black Wisconsin Universe 2000, Miss Continental Plus Wisconsin 2006, Miss Fluid Bar 2006, Miss Jodee’s International (Racine) 2007, Miss Triangle 2007, (the very first) Miss Pridefest 2008, Miss “IT” Milwaukee 2009, and Miss Mystique Great Lakes 2010.

With success came setbacks as well.  Being a Black trans woman on the larger end of the weight spectrum made her feel vulnerable on many fronts. She maintained office jobs and temp work.  At a suburban manufacturing job she held, the sister of a man she was dating “outed” her, and suddenly came the complaints of her being in the locker room with “real women” that previously went unnoticed all that time. 

Janice was terminated.  She acutely felt the rampant discrimination . Still, she was committed to making it precisely as she was in her world.

“My favorite times were the house parties and Black gay clubs in the tight-knit community,” she said. 

Along the way, she befriended and mentored others longing to pursue their authentic lives. She became a beacon and housemother to others and helped create showcases for them at clubs and organizations around Milwaukee. She currently holds positions as a founding member of SHEBA (Sisters Helping Each Other Battle Adversity) and as the House Mother of the House of History, dedicated to preserving and promoting the history of the Black LGBTQ experience in Milwaukee and Wisconsin.

Janice feels that a few decades ago, the LGBTQ community was more together and depended on each other for support.

“Many of the rights people enjoy today we didn’t have then. Working in your truth was not a thing then, and having equal access to medical treatment was not an option. Trans healthcare was spotty, and you had to pay out of pocket for hormone replacement. Black market feminization surgeries were a big thing, too,” she said.

Being told that you could live openly, marry who you loved, and enjoy the same rights as heterosexual couples were still in the future.

Through it all, though, Janice says that the only way forward is to “follow your dreams, never give up, and seek out your truth no matter what.

These are wise words indeed from someone who has made it to the other side and wants to help others achieve what she has—peace, contentment, and wisdom.